being a best friend

             Part of being a best friend is listening. Often friends seek advice or words to comfort him or her, but sometimes not saying anything shows the mark of a best friend. By discarding lengthy speeches and simply listening attentively, I can truly focus on my friend. Actively watching for subtle changes in emotion, flickers of internal thought, and facial expressions allows me to delve into my friend's situation. I simply allow myself to be infused by his or her story, whether it is a tale of a major success or heavy burden he or she needs to let out. It is then when apathy consumes me and I can try to feel what they are going through.
             Recently my friend Andy gave birth to her first child. The pregnancy was unintentional and her life has been completely altered. One night we were hanging out, just to shoot the breeze, but listening to her voice I heard submerged anguish and confusion.
             With that phrase she broke down and told me how utterly scared she was. Her baby's father had abandoned her and the young infant, she had to quite school, she felt alone. I sat there in silence. At the moment I wanted to kick myself for not knowing what to say. Nothing came to mind that could help her, I felt helpless and useless. Andy, however, didn't need a quick fix, an easy solution. She just had to let it go– all her worries and tattered emotions. Later I realized that even if I had been the smartest person in the world, nothing I could have said would have made things better for her. I just listened. My hushed concern was all that she needed, and she did feel relieved afterwards. I know now that expressing interest in a friends condition doesn't always require the right words, and by simply listening to someone speak, I can be a great friend.
             Laughing together is a major facet of being a best friend. To friends I am part comedian, part circus entertainer, and all toget
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