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Competition vs. Connection: How Women and Men

Research shows that there are differences in the ways that men and women communicate with each other in personal relationships. In her book, "You Just Don't Understand," sociolinguist, Deborah Tannen, examines the manner in which men and women communicate in personal relationships and the differences in communication styles is inherent in the basic make up of each sex. I have observed that communication styles of men and women affect reactions and outcomes of conversations between men and women; expectations and results. Socialization of boys and girls affects the ways that they communicate as adults. Tannen observed that "For women, talking about troubles is the essence of connection. I tell you my troubles, you tell me your troubles, and we're close. Men, however, hear troubles talk as a request for advice, so they respond with a solution." Men and women need to be aware of the inherent differences in their communication styles so that they don't have unrealistic expectations. Women communicate to attempt to create feelings of closeness, but men communicate to attempt to exhibit knowledge and skill. Numerous attempts have been made to explain gender differences in communication, and heredity and environment ar


I observed during a meeting that a former co-worker would talk above other same level workers with a certain tone that would seemingly elevate him above them. On-the-other-hand, women are more sensitive when talking with people in that they are much more aware of what they say in order to avoid sounding dominant, aggressive, or unfeminine. I would not put them in a position of "one-up" and I believe they were so adapted to conversing in that manner that they did not know how to hold a conversation with me. The interactions of males and females in the workplace have an affect on how the work gets done, who gets credit for doing it, and who gets heard in the process. Since babies are born male or female, their brains develop differently Tannen makes the point that both sexes need to understand the inherent differences in their communication styles so that they don't expect the impossible. In conclusion, men are reluctant to express their true feelings openly because that would make them vulnerable to ridicule by their peers. state that "while most studies of gender differences have acknowledged women's strong interpersonal skills, and for using them more effectively than do men, we've found that there are other areas of managerial effectiveness that traditionally women have not received much recognition or credit for. Further, these actions are manifest in the ways that males and females communicate in the workplace. Since childhood, males and females have been socialized to act in certain ways that are acceptable to society. As individuals, we are born into the same world but are socialized to live different existences. They try to maintain a connection to make everyone feel equal. " The report shows that out of the 31 skill areas tested, which included meeting deadlines, high productivity and generating new ideas, women out performed men. The report goes on to show that after averaging all the scores, women received higher evaluations than men did, but they were equal in the areas of delegating authority. It is imperative that we understand the styles of communication between men and women-that they are different-and there is a need to create a bridge between them so that everyone is understood for what they are truly saying, not we think they mean. Studies have proven than the ultimate goal of workers is to get the job done.

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Approximate Pages = 8 (250 words per page double spaced)

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