Research shows that there are differences in the ways that men and women communicate with each other in personal relationships. In her book, "You Just Don't Understand," sociolinguist, Deborah Tannen, examines the manner in which men and women communicate in personal relationships and the differences in communication styles is inherent in the basic make up of each sex. I have observed that communication styles of men and women affect reactions and outcomes of conversations between men and women; expectations and results. Socialization of boys and girls affects the ways that they communicate as adults. Tannen observed that "For women, talking about troubles is the essence of connection. I tell you my troubles, you tell me your troubles, and we're close. Men, however, hear troubles talk as a request for advice, so they respond with a solution." Men and women need to be aware of the inherent differences in their communication styles so that they don't have unrealistic expectations. Women communicate to attempt to create feelings of closeness, but men communicate to attempt to exhibit knowledge and skill.
             Numerous attempts have been made to explain gender differences in communication, and heredity and environment are at the top of the list. However, parts of the language differences are due to genetic makeup. Since babies are born male or female, their brains develop differently
             Tannen makes the point that both sexes need to understand the inherent differences in their communication styles so that they don't expect the impossible. There is middle ground where men and women can meet and find understanding. Women must learn that the kind of intimate talk they have with their girlfriends should remain just that. Trying to turn your man into a girlfriend will usually fail because men, in general, don't create feelings of closeness in that way. Men, too can understand that when their woman is talking, she...