China & Me & Confusion
The day after the American plane bombed the Chinese embassy in Yugoslavia, our core teacher took one whole period telling us how bad the United States was, and how we should never bow down to them. Every student in my class including myself was furious. One year after, the tragedy was written in our textbook. I read the passage about the evilness of the United States to my uncle with anger and patriotism on the phone. He said nothing, just sighed. That year, he was in America.A few years later, I was in Canada, a completely different world that turned my beliefs completely upset down, and put me into total confusion. Living in Canada has made me look at the world from a different perspective. When I was in China, my teachers and the news were my only two sources of politics. In other words, I only knew what the Chinese government wanted everyone to know. In the past, I always thought Tibet was just a one of China’s provinces, it was trying to be separated from us, and Dalai Lama was the bad person who caused it. The idea had never budged in my mind, until the day I received my world religions textbook. On the timeline of the chapter of Buddhism, it clearly stated that, “1989 CE Dalai Lama receives Nobel peace prize.” I was . . .
So in an outsiders perspective, was China a place where discriminations among them occur and daughters been thrown away? As a Chinese, I always defended my country and my belief against others, but was this China really was? Was what I have believed for thirteen years wrong? When I jumped out of the box and looked at China from a different view, I shivered in fear. Dalai Lama was on the list of good leaders, but I didn’t see a single trace of Chinese leaders, not even the great Chairman Mao. She said: “Your parents must have been very open minded then. What did they mean by took complete control? They were apart of us! They were in control the whole time! I knew some Canadians believed that China invaded Tibet, but I never could have thought that it would be included in a textbook. It was a hot summer afternoon, I was about to watch cartoon at 5:00pm, but suddenly all the cannels were showing the same news hosted by CCTV1. If it was true, why was Falun Gong legal in so many countries? Was it because all the other countries did not care whether it was a threat to the Chinese government? Or the true reason of the banishment of Falun Gong was just because, according to my textbook, “this movement has an estimated 70 million members, which is more than the membership of the Communist Party. After the presentation, I went to talk to the librarian that people did not throw away daughters anymore in China, and I even used myself as an example, but she still wouldn’t believe me. I was trying to persuade him that China did not invade Tibet, but there was a complicated concept. More than two thousand years of history and culture, China, why have you given me such confusion? Why have you done so much that I couldn’t understand? And why have you hid so much? The way a country worked was so complicated, maybe I’ll never understand it, but China is my native country, and I’ll always love her. It was the start of the crucial banishment of Falun Gong. ” I was speechless once again, because I read that article too. The country that I was so proud of did what? There is a library in our school, and from time to time, our English teacher brings us down to library to introduce us some new books to read. The librarian introduced four books about Chinese girls to us. The teacher gave us two lists of leaders, one list of bad leaders, and another list of good leaders.
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Acceptance Essays
