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Motherdaughter Conflicts

"My mother's expression was what devastated me: a quiet, blank look that said she lost everything." (p. 143, The Joy Luck Club) In the novel, The Joy Luck Club, by Amy Tan, the characters Suyuan and Jing-Mei (June) have a tumultuous mother-daughter relationship: one that ultimately is composed of conflict and commitment for one another. Their opposing ideas and beliefs is the product of their life experiences, which are drastically different. This and their lack of communication are responsible for many of the problems they face in their relationship. Only when June learns of her mother's past, her life experiences and the ways in which she was raised, can these conflicts be resolved. Amy Tan reveals several themes through her novel, in which she intends for her audiences to understand and learn. Some themes include such topics as life's choices, and understanding our family and ourselves.Mother-daughter relationships are perhaps the most painful but the most rewarding relationship women share. And though a simple comment such as "You're becoming more like your mother every day." might offend or strike terror in the female heart, she is still considered to be the rock on which we stand, and a steady hand that guides us


Since the "emotional survival" of those mothers required obedience and the invention of their false self, they had to repress their anger and believe that mother was always right. so why can't they express it? Maybe the mother was raised to respect their elders at their own expense, and to restrict their feelings and needs. Suyuan decided to leave for America, leaving China behind and placing her future and the future in the promise of a new land. It is a need that never leaves in the best or the worst of mother-daughter relationships. That's why the loss is incalculable when a daughter has to figure it out for herself, trail blaze rather than learn from an example. The majority of avengers were once abuse children physically or psychologically. The Critic: The critics come in many forms, regally condemning people who are not "the right sort. Whether our relationship is strained or easy, hostile or amiable- we need her, if only to validate our femaleness and to guide our way. Suyuan hides her past and puts all her effort into turning her daughter into the daughter she could never be: pushing June to succeed in dance and academics and piano. Murray Bowen describes as "deselfed", unable to defend themselves. The most striking personality of an avenger is the need to be the center of attention and he will go to all lengths to remain in the spotlight. Suyuan lost her two daughters in China and her entire family was destroyed in the war. The Cultural Gap Women now in their 60's and 70's find the world of their daughters foreign in ways of tradition and language.

Common topics in this essay:
Murray Bowen, Gap Tension, Medical Center, Natural Enemy, Amy Tan, Unpleasable Mother, Fear Avenger, Suyuan June, Baby Boomers, Temperamental Gap, mothers daughters, mother-daughter relationship, mother-daughter relationships, joy luck club, june failed, hopes expectations, history temperament, gap mothers, life experiences, unpleasable mothers, lack communication,

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Approximate Word count = 2102
Approximate Pages = 8 (250 words per page double spaced)

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