The Unwanted Child
THE SILENCE OF MARY'S HUSBAND AND HOW IT WILL INEVITABILITY EFFECT THEIR MARRIAGE"The Unwanted Child", by Mary Clearman Blew, is a look into the life of this author when she was 18-year-old and facing several unexpected, important decisions. These decisions were regarding the path she would choose that would ultimately map out what the rest of her life would be like. Mary marries at a young age with the notion that marriage will bring her all the excitement and grown up experiences that she longs for. However, her plans for her life come to a harsh holt when she learns that she is pregnant. Everyone from her grandmother to her in-laws seems to have different opinions about what she should do and the new plans that she should now make. One important family member who's voice does not really surface is her husbands. Throughout the whole ordeal he remains relatively silent. This is rather troubling considering that he is her husband and they did just recently marry. There are many examples of the hard decisions Mary has to make on her own because she and her husband do not talk about the situation. They do not discuss and come to a mutual decision about what is best for both of them. She has to wonder if she will turn
If she always defers to your husband's parent's wishes she will be left with resentment, and their marriage will lose intimacy in the relationship as a result of her feelings. She and her husband took on the responsibilities of marriage and parenthood together. Also, the fact that Mary never mentions her disapproval of her husband's silence is troubling because he should be her biggest supporter. The marriage will surely fail for Mary will eventually put her own foot down and take her husband's silence no more. The ultimate deterioration of their marriage will be caused by their failure to have effectively communicated. But she knows that she will probably end up just like her and resenting her own child for taking away her dreams. "But Mary! Tiny babies have to be kept warm!" "But Mary! How can you expect to go to college and take good care of a husband and a baby?" And finally, "We're going to put our foot down!" (73). However, there is no mention of she and her husband mutually agreeing on what they want to do about having a baby and both finishing school. The marriage of Mary and her husband is very troublesome for the obvious lack of communication so early in their relationship presents the notion that the marriage is destined to fail. She did not agree to forfeit her own development or always place her needs last if there was a child. And even after Mary decided for herself that she would attend college and have a baby at the same time the in-laws are still chiming in on their disapproval and what she needs to do. Mary's husband's parents have a high control over their son's life. "I guess this is finally the end of college for you!" (62). Mary could be just like her mother and live the life of a housewife. "Unlike my in-laws, who have not hesitated to tell me I should go to work as a typist or a waitress to support my husband through college (after all, he will be supporting me for the rest of my life), my grandmother believes I should get my own credentials" (62).
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Acceptance Essays
