Managing Conflict
Conflict is the interaction of interdependent people who perceive incompatible goals and interference from each other in achieving those goals. Conflicts occur in all social settings. Interpersonal conflict is a disagreement between or among "connected" individuals. Each person's position affects the other by emphasizing the transactional nature. How you view conflict can strongly affect the way you deal with it. For example, many people view conflict as always painful. From this point of view, unless you enjoy being blamed, put down, and shouted at, it's hard to be positive about conflicts; however, if you see conflict as something entirely negative, you will behave accordingly and will probably help create a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more you believe it's awful the worse it will get. Conflicts are often said to be beneficial. Some potential positive functions of conflicts: conflicts allow important issues to be aired; they produce new and creative ideas; they release built-up tension; they can strengthen relationships; they can cause groups and organizations to re-evaluate and clarify goals and missions; and they can also stimulate social change to eliminate inequities and injustices. These advantages are raised
Even for "old hands' of negotiation, conflicts are often unpleasant and frightening. An unclean carpet can triple in weight within a couple of years, and most relationships get so laden with undigested arguments that they collapse into a somber, angry stupor and cease to move toward their original goal. Transcendent discourse is worthy of consideration as a response to a moral conflict. Thus, I felt justified in fighting for what I wanted, and I saw myself as the victor. The first choice is to always deny that you had anything to do with the situation in the first place. These cycles can only be thought of as unified wholes, and they can often be self-reinforcing. With my self-centered adolescent perspective I had begun to use my parent's deteriorating marital situation to my own advantage. By learning that sometimes it's our own transparently manipulative behavior that creates defensiveness in others, we are one step closer to communicating interpersonally. As with any self-respecting mechanism, blaming others for misdeeds allows you to maintain a positive self-image in light of attacks perceived as threatening. How an argument happens is more important than the outcome that emerges. When any combination of the six "defensive producing" elements of evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty is present, a spiral, usually begins, a spiral that starts with a little discomfort and often escalates into all-out conflict. However, understanding that transcendent behavior is not a method for resolving moral conflicts, thinking they are neutral ground without values, blindly realistic and not a remedy for all situations. I should really try to avoid future confrontations and detour my anger through out relationships by talking instead of suppressing and allowing my parents to know first of all that I love and appreciate them, and most of all that I respect them. Transcendent eloquence has five general characteristics; it is (1) philosophical, (2) comparative, (3) dialogic, (4) critical, and (5) transformative. Other criteria of conflict I met included: argumentative with adults, frequent temper loss, swearing, often angry and resentful, defiance of adult rules and requests, and a tendency to blame others for my own mistakes or difficulties.
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Acceptance Essays
