"A dependant"
            
             Recently, I played a personality test, and my result said that I am a dependant person. If asking me the reason why, I can say that one of main causes is because of my parents. Many parents often have higher attitudes on their children, and my parents are not the exception. They always like to put their valuation on me, wish me to do what they want. Many times, they have already planned many things for me before I make any decisions. Day by day, if I told them my own opinion, they would ignore it eventually, and they just thought what the best choice was what they made. Sometimes, in their love, I felt that I lost my own real value.
             When I was a kid, my out-performance looked like a boy that what my parents wanted me to act. Therefore, they always gave me many jeans that I really hated. Every time when we were going out and my sisters dressed up, all I could take on was only a pair of jeans. Because of that, I always cried before leaving the house, so it wasted their time to calm me down. Just now, they give up the idea to pretend me a boy. On the other way round, especially my mother, she is still trying to find some wardrobes what I should wear, no matter I like or not.
             The most violent of our contradiction is the problem of religion. In their mind, they always believe in ancient. When I said I have already believed in Jesus Christ that means to be a Christian. Their response was very great. They did not allow this violently. They always prohibited me to go to the church, be with brothers and sisters in the Lord, and the other meetings. Sometimes, they punished me by some hard materials. I felt very painful not only on my body, but also in my spirit. I did not know why they did that, but I knew I am their child that I should obey their rules. I also thought I had my freedom to choose which one I would like much and I knew what I was doing. Everyone cannot barrier me to think anything in my mind.
             When I was a c...