In the novel "Heart of Darkness," written by Joseph Conrad, Marlow finds himself in a position where he is faced to accept the fact that the man he has admired and looked up to is a madman. He realizes that Kurtz's methods are not only unethical, but also inhumane. Marlow comes to realize that Kurtz is evil, and that he himself is also evil, thus Marlow's disillusion makes his identification with Kurtz horrifying.
             As Marlow travels up the river, he is constantly preoccupied with Kurtz. From the beginning of his trip, he is compared to Kurtz by all of the people that he comes into contact with, and a great deal of his thoughts are of Kurtz. He wonders how he will measure up to the standards that the company set for him, what Kurtz's personality is like, and what Kurtz would think of him. The more obsessed he becomes with Kurtz, the more he sets himself up for the horrible reality of what his new idol was truly made of.
             Upon reaching Kurtz's station, Marlow's disillusion begins to set in. He is greeted by an English-speaking Russian whom he takes for a man who on the surface is decent level-headed person, but after short conversation it is apparent to Marlow that he is talking with a disturbed individual, but that was not what bothered Marlow. Hearing of and seeing the acts committed by Kurtz made Marlow uneasy, and even afraid. It was at this point that Marlow begins his denial of any likeness he feels with Kurtz. Marlow sees all of the atrocities committed by Kurtz, and is dismayed, but when he looks deep within himself he sees what he could easily become, and he desperately wants to suppress it.
             Once Kurtz is on the boat, and headed with Marlow back to civilization, things take a strange turn. Though Marlow and Kurtz have little to talk about, they develop a distinct respect for each other. As Kurtz dies, Marlow accepts this death easily and remains loyal to his dying requests. It troubles Marlow a gr...