to grow. Furthermore, Proctor realizes" with a deep hatred of himself," that Abigail may denounce him by admitting to their lechery. John had committed adultery and had absolutely no intentions of admitting it to anyone because he was not willing to pay the town's consequences for his act. So when he finds, in the end of Act Two, that Abigail could ruin him without bringing her own "saintliness" down, he is disgusted with himself for not telling of his fornification when he had the chance to destroy her reputation
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