ot; he said, "You are very much awake. I am here to take you on a tour of Hellywood."
             "Hellywood," I asked him, "What the hell is Hellywood?"
             "Well, I'm sure I got you all shook up, but don't be cruel, baby! Come with me and everything will fall into place."
             He stood up and walked toward me, placed his hand on my hip, gently leaned over and kissed me on the cheek, took my hand and led me over to my closet door. He stepped through the mirror and pulled me behind him. We were immediately taken to a surreal location; Rodeo Drive. The whole ordeal made me want to shout out, "Toto, I have a feeling we aren't in Kansas anymore." In spite of all the strange things that had just occurred, Elvis' presence made everything seem all right.
             At first glance, I knew I was in the heart of Beverly Hills since I had often visited Rodeo Drive on spur of the moment shopping sprees. Yet, after looking over the renowned and high status locale, things seemed eerily different. "Welcome to Hellywood," said Elvis, in a bone chilling tone, "the place where all those famous are forever condemned." It was then I saw high above us, set on the side of a hill, a nine letter word that made my skin crawl, "HELLYWOOD". Still holding my hand, Elvis led me down Rodeo Drive. We came upon 2 men sitting behind a desk, stacked high with video tapes and one huge TV. Elvis leaned over and whispered something to them. They smiled and nodded at his statement then turned to me.
             "I am Siskel." The man on the left said.
             "And I am Ebert. We are in charge of critiquing those damned and placing them in the different "stores" of hell."
             I recognized them after introducing themselves, the world famous movie critics who dubbed the phrase, "two thumbs up" as their own.
             "Stores," I asked, "I'm sorry but all of t...