e but those 20 lbs weren't enough to gain the popularity or the "guys" I wanted. Watching my thin girlfriends go out on dates made my determination to lose weight increase, for I wanted the very same attention from those very same guys. These very good friends that I trusted only saw me as a burden to be with. They were more interested in hanging out with the upper-classmen this led them to exclude me in the social events that they attended as well as denying the friendship that I thought we had. Having my closest friends "dump me" for the reason of being overweight and ugly provoked me to think that society only respected thin people. Although I lost my friends in school, the anonymous friends I had on the Internet were still there. Another disappointment that I have noticed was that even Internet guys would want the thin anorexic looking girls. At that ti!
             me, the Internet was the only "joy" side in my life. Fooling the guys didn't seem as if I was lying because I was basically having a relationship with the computer screen. Imaginations of being the thin girl that society wanted made me wander off into fantasy but coming back to reality, I noticed that I wasn't the 32B-24-34 Barbie doll. Having access to the Internet was a big advantage for me because I ran home with the eagerness in opening an e-mail love letter. I preferred that to running home with tears of embarrassment.
             As time went by, the definitions of being a "perfectionist" was to be thin. Being thin became the main reason into being the "perfectionist". Sadly, the "walking clothes hangers" were now my role model that I looked up to. I became their number one fan.
             After hearing that the guy I admired made fun of my heftiness made more determined to lose weight during the summer. My whole summer plan was basically go on the strictest diet ever. That very jerk was probably one of many reason t...